A Contest of Humility
WRITER: Phil Bray POSTED: November 28, 2024
A CONTEST OF HUMILITY
Marriage is a contest of humility. Husbands are commanded to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph 5:25-30). Jesus’ love for the church is displayed in a humble self-sacrifice for the well-being of another. “In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:10). “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Husbands must be willing to lay down their lives each and every day for the sake of their wife’s well being physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Husbands must be willing to sacrifice their wants and desires, their priorities even when it is necessary to provide genuine service to their wives. Many men claim that they would willingly die to protect their wives. I believe that is true. Yet, the sacrifice typically required is often less dramatic and more often ignored. Are you willing to take a day off of work to stay home with a sick child so she can go to work? Are you willing to cook dinner for her or to clean up afterwards? Are you willing to turn off the game in order to listen to her after she had a difficult day at work? This kind of sacrifice is a daily commitment to think of her as more important than yourself. It requires humility.
Wives, likewise, are called to humble service. “Wives be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord” (Eph 5:22). Wives are called to voluntarily place themselves under the authority and care of their husbands. They are to treat him with respect, deferring to his leadership when an agreement cannot be reached between them. She is to be gentle, refusing to revile when reviled. She refuses to utter threats, choosing to entrust herself to God as Jesus did (1 Pet 2:18-3:6). A wife is called to honor and respect her husband by her demeanor and treatment. This is not difficult when a husband is kind and gracious, loving and thoughtful. It is harder when a husband is selfish and inconsiderate. Are you willing to treat him with gentle respect even then? This kind of sacrifice is a daily commitment to think of him as more important than yourself. It requires humility.
Philippians 2:3-4 provides some of the clearest and most helpful instruction on how to cultivate humility in your heart. Husbands as you learn to love your wife by sacrificially serving her and wives as you learn to respect your husbands by graciously submitting to him this simple command will help you tremendously. “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (Php 2:3-4). Marriage becomes a contest of humility as husbands and wives begin viewing one another as more important than themselves, when they begin putting their selfish desires to the side in order to meet the real needs of their spouse. This attitude is Christ-like and godly (Php 2:5-11). Marriage does not have to be complicated or complex. Humble yourself and serve your spouse for their good. Sacrifice your pride, your will, and your agenda in order to do what is best for them. You will find that marriage can become a paradise you enjoy rather than a prison you endure.
Marriage is a contest of humility. Husbands are commanded to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph 5:25-30). Jesus’ love for the church is displayed in a humble self-sacrifice for the well-being of another. “In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:10). “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Husbands must be willing to lay down their lives each and every day for the sake of their wife’s well being physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Husbands must be willing to sacrifice their wants and desires, their priorities even when it is necessary to provide genuine service to their wives. Many men claim that they would willingly die to protect their wives. I believe that is true. Yet, the sacrifice typically required is often less dramatic and more often ignored. Are you willing to take a day off of work to stay home with a sick child so she can go to work? Are you willing to cook dinner for her or to clean up afterwards? Are you willing to turn off the game in order to listen to her after she had a difficult day at work? This kind of sacrifice is a daily commitment to think of her as more important than yourself. It requires humility.
Wives, likewise, are called to humble service. “Wives be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord” (Eph 5:22). Wives are called to voluntarily place themselves under the authority and care of their husbands. They are to treat him with respect, deferring to his leadership when an agreement cannot be reached between them. She is to be gentle, refusing to revile when reviled. She refuses to utter threats, choosing to entrust herself to God as Jesus did (1 Pet 2:18-3:6). A wife is called to honor and respect her husband by her demeanor and treatment. This is not difficult when a husband is kind and gracious, loving and thoughtful. It is harder when a husband is selfish and inconsiderate. Are you willing to treat him with gentle respect even then? This kind of sacrifice is a daily commitment to think of him as more important than yourself. It requires humility.
Philippians 2:3-4 provides some of the clearest and most helpful instruction on how to cultivate humility in your heart. Husbands as you learn to love your wife by sacrificially serving her and wives as you learn to respect your husbands by graciously submitting to him this simple command will help you tremendously. “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (Php 2:3-4). Marriage becomes a contest of humility as husbands and wives begin viewing one another as more important than themselves, when they begin putting their selfish desires to the side in order to meet the real needs of their spouse. This attitude is Christ-like and godly (Php 2:5-11). Marriage does not have to be complicated or complex. Humble yourself and serve your spouse for their good. Sacrifice your pride, your will, and your agenda in order to do what is best for them. You will find that marriage can become a paradise you enjoy rather than a prison you endure.