What is a Rule of Life?
God made each of us different and unique—that much is clear. Some people love to plan things in advance. For the rest of us, advance planning feels much more like work than something we might enjoy. My personality is more suited to solving problems than to making plans. So, where someone might say, “Let’s plan a birthday party for so-and-so,” I prefer to think that there is a birthday problem that needs to be solved.
Whether you are a plan-maker or a problem-solver, having a Rule of Life helps us clearly define our priorities and be intentional in each of our relationships.
A Rule of Life sounds legalistic on the surface, doesn’t it? Why do I need a rule? Aren’t we free in Christ? Am I at risk of becoming a Pharisee—someone who adds rules to appear holy when their heart is far from God?
Rest assured that a rule isn’t legalistic or pharisaical. In fact, the Greek word for “rule” comes from the same root as the word we also translate trellis. A trellis is a tool for gardening. Think of a vineyard: a healthy vine will produce more grapes than the strength of the vine alone can support. So, we attach the vine to a trellis - a wooden or metal structure that supports the weight of the vine and its fruit. The result is that the vine is able to produce more grapes than it would if it were resting on the ground. It also allows the owner to stretch the vine in a straight line and at a height ideal for harvesting.
In the same way, having a Rule of Life helps us by adding structure to our lives that leads us to become more relationally fruitful.
What is the goal of having a Rule of Life? Author Peter Scazzero offers this: “Union with God in Christ, transformation into His image, and the freeing of our hearts from anything that stands in the way of Christ living in and through us.”
Put simply, a Rule of Life helps us to say “yes” to things that bring us closer to Christ and “no” to things that stand in our way.
For example, a college student who has been struggling to find time to study the Bible amid all their other studies might create a rule that they will set apart Wednesday nights to attend a Bible study at their church and spend 15 minutes every morning following a daily reading plan. By doing this, they are saying “yes” to studying the Bible in community and beginning each day in the Scriptures. Additionally, they are saying “no” to impromptu activities like a Wednesday night intramural basketball game or even scheduling a study group. They may also be saying “no” to that snooze button and committing to get ready 15 minutes earlier than usual to follow their reading plan.
They aren’t doing these things legalistically; rather, they are being intentional about growing in holiness. Legalism wants to be seen by others as holy; a Rule of Life is something done in private out of a genuine desire to be more like Jesus.
So then, how might we create a personal Rule of Life?
Consider these categories: Prayer, Rest, Work/Activity, and Relationships.
Under Prayer, we might ask:
How can I better know the Scriptures? How can I spend time in silence and solitude? How can I set aside time to pray? How can I study the Bible in community?
For Rest, we might ask:
What does my Sabbath look like? (Someone who works weekends will have a different-looking Sabbath, but it will be no less a day set apart for God.) How can I live more simply? What about play and recreation?
For Work/Activity:
How can I serve others? What does it look like to live on mission? How might I care for my physical body?
And in Relationships:
What helps me to be emotionally healthy? How is Christ most glorified how I spend time with my family? How do I maintain friendships with my brothers and sisters in Christ?
You may want to add elements such as hospitality, generosity, or other practices that help you live out your calling. There is a helpful website created by author John Mark Comer http://www.practicingtheway.org that guides you through a series of questions to help you craft your own personalized Rule of Life.
Finally, one of the best encouragements we can offer one another is to create our personalized rule alongside a fellow believer who can hold us accountable and offer wisdom on our journey toward becoming more like Christ.